I don't know why i'm so afraid to pick up the violin? I'm so scared of trying and putting in the effort. it's always in my mind, but I choose time and time again not to take it out of the closet. I have no drive.
why did I want to learn of the play the violin in the first place?
Since I was a kid, I thought the violin was a beautiful instrument. I can't remember or recall the actual day it was when I first saw and listened to a violin..maybe it was church? Maybe during a christmas eve service? But as the years passed by, I wanted to learn, but, I wanted it to be like in the movies..where I picked up something and after a few tries you got it. I know that's stupid.
If you wanted to get better at something it takes practice. I just don't want to do it. but also...I want someone to want to hear me play..
I want to be mysterious...if that makes any sense? I want to be the guy that full of surprises, but the hole in that plan is...I'm a loner so there's no one around or close to me to be surprised; so why bother?
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